The Wisdom of Children
Highland Avenue Church of the Brethren
Pastor Katie Shaw Thompson – August 28, 2022
The Wisdom of Children – Luke 18: 15-17
As a child or an adult, have you ever experienced a time when a child’s lack of experience led to a creative insight that adults failed to see? Neuroscientists might explain this as a function of the default mode network that adult humans develop over the course of our lives and which has not yet fully come online in children.
The default mode network helps adults make decisions based on assumptions and knowledge from prior experience. It saves time and energy but it can also cut those adult brains off from easily accessing the most creative solutions. Children, on the other hand, are still growing in experience and knowledge of the world and therefore regularly expend more time and energy solving problems than adults but often doing so in more creative ways.
Researchers are still testing their theories about this way the human brain works, including exploring whether an out of balance default mode network may be at play in a variety of mental health challenges.[1] But one of their early conclusions is that children are tapped into awe, connection, and creativity in ways that adults no longer find as easily. I suspect that when Jesus teaches, “Truly, I tell you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God as a little child will never enter it,” these innate gifts of children are at least an aspect of what he is talking about.
How do we receive and enter the kingdom of God? If becoming like a little child is part of it, as Jesus teaches, adults would do well to look to the wisdom of children.
In the time period of this text, babies and children occupied the lowest rung on the social ladder of status. Their survival was questionable and their value seen primarily through the lens of their potential to contribute to their family’s ledger of honor and shame.
I’d like to say it’s very different today. But I wonder how different it is. Yes, there are ways in which the dominant culture worships youth and disdains aging. But at the same time, children are often granted severely limited agency and are often still viewed primarily through the lens of their potential to bring honor or shame to their family rather than valuable and unique individuals unto themselves.
TV star Lori Loughlin and other rich Americans have been in the news in recent years for bribing college admissions officials to accept their children at prestigious schools. The news coverage has been accompanied with much conversation about the line for parents between helping and hurting and between wanting good things for their kids and wanting their kids to make them look like good parents. And as a parent, I know that issue does not only arise for parents navigating higher education opportunities with their children.
In her book, Raising Free People, Akilah Richards talks about something she calls the “adult gaze” to describe her experience of the expectations of the other adults around her. Specifically, she finds it helpful to ask herself whether she is prioritizing the relationship she has with her daughters or prioritizing the relationship she has with other adult’s opinions. Does this serve my daughter, she asks, or does it serve my seeking approval under the “adult gaze?”
In redressing the disciples’ attempts to block the children from him, Jesus is making clear that he prioritizes his relationship with each individual regardless of their social status, including children, over his own ledger of honor and shame in the eyes of the dominant culture. His disciples, understandably, want their teacher to be shown the respect due to him as a person they so highly value. But once again, Jesus challenges those disciples to grow in their understanding of what is valuable, honorable, and respectful.
Are there ways in which our faith community does a good job of honoring and respecting each person regardless of their age or any other status? Are there ways we can continue to grow in our capacity to do that? I think the answer is yes to both those questions. And, I think if we ask those same questions of our families and ourselves, we will find the answer is also, yes.
The book of Luke is an excellent place to turn for guidance on this aspect of faithful community living. From Mary’s Magnificat to the Sermon on the Plain to this chapter 18 we read today, the book of Luke highlights God’s special concern for those who are undervalued in their community as well as the call of Jesus followers to give up the ways we make idols of gaining status in our culture’s ledger of honor and shame.
Taken together as a part of what we know as The Gospel According to Luke, I understand a clear theme that all of our clinging to earthly status and security will not lead us to receiving the kingdom of God in its fullness–a place where all are loved, valued, and made whole and well. No matter what age we are, I believe we have the opportunity to expand our experience of that kingdom more fully as individuals and as a community.
Earlier this summer, I enjoyed an online panel of three sets of parents and their LGBTQ+ children who shared about the impact of parental support and the ways we can create more nurturing communities for all. One parent remembered children hear what the adults in their life say. They hear the jokes they make. They hear the judgments they pronounce on others who can’t hear them.
The insights that caught my breath though came from a parent and child who identify as being part of the Latinx community. The child recalled coming out as LGBTQ to their abuela, describing it as really hard and painful. “It was tough,” the child shared, “because I know she doesn’t understand. That’s not her context. But it was worth it to sit down and take the time to explain it to her. And there are still things we have to explain to her. Because pronouns are a thing, because of Spanish being such a gendered language. There is no neutral. Like, they/them isn’t a thing.
Here the mother interrupted to say “It’s becoming a thing. It’s becoming a thing because language can change. And people can change. I always try to tell folks,” she continued “that we are the ancestors for the people who are coming after us. We are their role models. So, right now there might not be someone you can think of who will be a role model for you. But what kind of role model will you want to be for that next person?”
We are the ancestors–all of us sitting here of every age. How we treat each other and nurture community among ourselves makes a difference for those who come after. What kind of ancestors do we want to be?
Today we dedicated ourselves to be faithful, nurturing community for these three children. How will we live into that call? How will we honor our own child-like wisdom, whether we are 9 or 90? How will we keep our connection to holy awe, treasured relationship, and life-bringing creativity alive? How will we cultivate a healthy respect for each other, ourselves, and God? How will we give thanks for all the lessons learned from our ancestors as we become ancestors ourselves?
I trust we won’t always live into the dream of doing our best in any of those areas. And, I also trust that when we humble ourselves before God just as we are then we will indeed experience the love, nurture, and peace that is to be found in the kingdom of God.
May it be so. Amen.
[1] You can read more in Michael Pollan’s How to Change Your Mind along with a lot of other interesting information on the new research on neuroscience, mental health, spirituality, and psychedelic drugs.
